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Norway x Reader

               A large smirk appeared on your face. You had a playful glint in your (e/c) eyes. Everything was about to fall into place.
"I can't wait to see his reaction," you snickered to yourself.
"It'll be priceless!"
You wiggled your fingers above the keyboard, and clicked send.
"Now, I wait…heh-heh….." you put your fingers together, as an evil mastermind would.
"BWAHAHAHAHA-" your evil laughter was interrupted by your friend, who was at the moment, one of your victims. He probably wouldn't care that much, since he enjoyed pranking and trolling others with you.
"__________? I heard THAT laugh….what are you up to this time?" Mathias asked, while entering the room.
You turned dramatically in your swivel chair to face him. Your lips curled up in delight.
"Why don't you take a look?" you purred.
He walked over to your computer, and you pressed play. The YouTube video loaded up and started. The sound of, "Bad Touch," by Bloodhound Gang filled the room. As the video continued, Mathias's eyes widened. This continued until blood burst out of his nose, and onto the computer screen.
With this you cracked up.
"DICK! So…much…d-dick…." yelled Mathias, his head smashed on the floor.
"Awwww, it's just a video! Chill yo' nuts!"  He forced his head up, looked you in the eye, and proceeded to laugh his ass off.
"That was the funniest thing ever!!! D-don't tell me you sent that to anyone??!!?" he was clutching his stomach on the ground, practically dying.
"HELL YEAH, I sent it to someone. Wait….allow, me to correct myself. MORE LIKE, EVERYONE! Everyone shall receive this video! BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" you laughed, this time uninterrupted.
By this time, Mathias had stood up. He had recovered, for the MOST part.
"You know, Lukas is going to kill BOTH of us when he finds out," he said, still chuckling.
"What's he going to do?!" you hollered.
"Strangle me with a tie?! I'm not scared of him!" you and Mathias laughed.
"Maybe I am a little scared…"you thought to yourself, gulping.
-----Sweden and Finland's Reaction-----
Tino's face was red as a ripe tomato.
"Turn it off, Berwald!" he pleaded.
"I kn'w it a'l aln'g." said Berwald, his face as straight as a brick.
-----Axis's Reaction-----
Ludwig flipped his cell phone shut.
"VERDAMMT, __________!"
"What is it Ludwig?" Feliciano cooed.
"Nothing….where's Kiku?"
"MANGAKA MODE, ON! I MUST START ON THE STORY BOARD IMMEDIATELY!!!" Kiku yelled.
He was running around like a chicken without its head, holding some paper and a bundle of calligraphy pens.
"These people…." Ludwig face palmed.
-----France and England's Reaction-----
"Dammit Frog, why'd you stop!" Arthur cried while panting.
"Ohohohohohon, Angleterre, look at this!" said Francis.
He repositioned himself and handed Arthur his phone, while wiping off a bead of sweat.
"BLOODY HELL!" he screamed, tossing Francis's phone into a wall.
"MY CELL!" shrieked Francis.
"Shut-up, and get back to pumping!"  Arthur commanded.
"Fine," Francis pouted, thrusting down the lever of the tire pump.
"You owe me for this one! Crappy English cars…."
-----BACK TO YOU BABY-----
You and Mathias were still laughing from previous events.
"Look how mad he is!" you said, pointing to Ludwig's text message.
From: LUDDY<3
To: __________
Verdammt, __________! Why must you keep sending such things! DUE TO YOUR LACK OF DISCIPLINE, WE SHALL ADD 100 ADDITIONAL PUSH-UPS TO YOUR TRAINING TOMORROW!!!!
Sincerely,
Ludwig
"Oh my gosh!" Mathias exclaimed, wiping a tear from his eye.
"This is pricele-"
Someone burst through your office door. It was Lukas. Holding a baseball bat….with nails in it...
"SHIT," you and Mathias said simultaneously.
Lukas jumped in the air and smashed the top of Mathias's head. This resulted in him falling face flat on the floor for the second time that day.
"That looked like it hurt…….." you thought.
"NO, WAIT, THAT LOOKED LIKE IT REALLY FUCKING HURT!!!" your mind screamed at you.
"__________," Lukas said, dropping his bat on the floor.
"Y-yes?!" you squeaked.
"You must be punished," he forged forward, tangling  his fingers in your (h/l) (h/c) hair.
Your heart started to beat faster. He was so damn close.
"H-how are you going to do that?" you stuttered, your face burning red.
"Let me show you~" he smirked, tilting his head to the side and licking your neck.
"……………RAPE!" you yelled.
Lukas picked you up in a way that forced you to wrap his legs around him.
"It's not rape if you enjoy it," he responded cheekily to your comment.
"OH DEAR GOD," was all you said before he began walking you to your bedroom.
-----Sealand's Reaction-----
"Mummy, Daddy!" Peter ran towards his parents, waving his phone in the air.
Tino and Berwald walked up from the couch, and over to their adoptive son.
"What are Uncle Mathias and Uncle Norway doing in this video?!" he asked, jumping up and down.
OH THE INNOCENCE OF A CHILD.
Tino screamed.
"How could ___________ send that video to a child?!!?!" he exclaimed.
Berwald sighed. He knew it was officially time for THE talk. He crouched down, and placed a firm hand on Peter's shoulder.
"S'n, do y'knw what s'x is?"
Tino's eyes widened.
"A little boy couldn't possibly know what sex is!" he thought, hiding his face in his hands.
"Of course I do Daddy! It's when two people….."
Peter continued to give a thorough explanation of the human reproductive system that could put a college professor to shame.
Here's the finished story :iconandromserkt: requested!
She asked for A NorwayxReader crack story, I hope it has enough crack for you! XD YOU HAVEN'T LIVED UNTIL YOU'VE HEARD BAD TOUCH BY BLOODHOUND GANG. [link]

Norway(Lukas), Denmark(Mathias), Sweden(Berwald), Finland(Tino), Germany(Ludwig), Italy(Feliciano), Japan(Kiku), France(Francis), England(Arthur), and Sealand(Peter), belong to Hidekaz Himaruya!

Writing belongs to me
You belong to Norway~ :iconnorwayrapefaceplz:

I don't think this needs a mature content, but if you ask, I'll add it.

EDIT: You guuuys. I haven't been my DA for a while but you all JUST MAKE MY DAY EVERYDAY. MMMF. <3
Add a Comment:
 
:iconnevermoremist:
Nevermoremist Featured By Owner Edited 1 day ago
They have an icon for Lmao they should have one for
->roflmfao<- because it is sorely needed for this story.
Reply
:iconxximmortaltechxx:
XxImmortalTechxX Featured By Owner May 20, 2015  Student General Artist
I AM FUCKING DEAD MY GOD.
THIS ENTIRE FIC IS A TROLL.
BUT DEM ENGLISH CARS DOH.
Reply
:iconthemonsterinsideofme:
TheMonsterInsideofMe Featured By Owner May 6, 2015  New Deviant
Sealand... How did you know all this? I really wanna know how the rest of the world would have reacted to that video (America's reaction...)
Reply
:iconvocaloidfan16:
VocaloidFan16 Featured By Owner May 13, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
XD me too! Plus, Sealand! You shouldn't know.
Reply
:iconthemonsterinsideofme:
TheMonsterInsideofMe Featured By Owner May 13, 2015  New Deviant
Yeah. Maybe he was hanging around France at England's for too long...
Reply
:iconvocaloidfan16:
VocaloidFan16 Featured By Owner May 13, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
...We will never let him do that again...
Reply
:iconthemonsterinsideofme:
TheMonsterInsideofMe Featured By Owner May 13, 2015  New Deviant
Agreed.
Reply
:iconcorpsepartyfan2244:
CorpsePartyFan2244 Featured By Owner May 3, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
I AM LAYING ON MY FLOOR LAUGHING SO HARD RIGHT NOW! AND THE ENDING, THE INNOCENCE OF SEALAND WAS LOST THAT DAY AS HE EXPLAINED WHAT IT WAS! IM CRYING NOW! XD
Reply
:iconakitomimcfarland:
AkitomiMcfarland Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2015
I laughed so hard.. I puked o3o
Reply
:iconfluffykitty134:
Fluffykitty134 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2015
Laughing so...FLIPPING HARD XDD Happy Tee Hee 
Reply
:iconreallifeninja19:
reallifeninja19 Featured By Owner Apr 23, 2015  New Deviant
Omo
OMG! WTF! XD
I WANTED laugh to the point where I end up in the hospital while saying 'I have no regrets', but everyone in the household was asleep and it was still 2 in the morning

AWESOME story tho XD
Reply
:iconkyoko-kimo:
Kyoko-Kimo Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
O_o
I am laughing my ass off
This is Hilarious
The ending
BAHAHAHA XD
Reply
:iconkirstenjasbrfgkvab:
kirstenjasbrfgkvab Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2015
that france scene though would r8 8/8 gr8 m8
Reply
:iconpowerfulannie:
PowerfulAnnie Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL
Reply
:iconcr8zyg8rl:
cr8zyg8rl Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2015  Student Digital Artist
The freak Peter?
Reply
:iconneko-lucifer:
Neko-Lucifer Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2015
Peters been on the internet hasn't he?
Reply
:iconagenuslewolfus:
AgenusLeWolfus Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
The pumping totally got me. I thought England and France were playing with the 'candy' stick. Gahhhh
Reply
:iconneko-lucifer:
Neko-Lucifer Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2015
'candy' stick....beautiful description XD
Reply
:iconagenuslewolfus:
AgenusLeWolfus Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Rightttt!!!!!!
Reply
:icondinonutstar:
dinoNUTSTAR Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2015  Student Artist
WTF SEALAND I CAN'T EVEN DO THAT SHIZ WTF IM OLDER THEN CHU I ALMOST FAILED THAT XD
Reply
:iconbunnygoblin:
Bunnygoblin Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2015
what the hell were they doing?
Reply
:iconimzefemprussia:
ImZeFemPrussia Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2015  Student Writer
Ohhhh shit sealand
Reply
:iconorchidblossom10:
OrchidBlossom10 Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2015  Student General Artist
Greenland: BIG BROTHER!! *faints*


(~_~メ)
Reply
:iconelectricalminx:
ElectricalMiNx Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
XD My parents don't want to tell me about sex but hey! I am 12 and I learned it from the internet!
Reply
:iconreallifeninja19:
reallifeninja19 Featured By Owner Edited May 2, 2015  New Deviant
True that man, who wouldn't learn that at an early age these days......


I learned about it when I was 5 tho..... but my family doesn't know THAT
Reply
:iconelectricalminx:
ElectricalMiNx Featured By Owner May 2, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I first learned it when I was 8!
Reply
:iconpoisonazalea:
PoisonAzalea Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2015  Student Writer
I  learned when I was 9 and I'm 12 now.

I know more about it than an 18 year old should
Reply
:iconelectricalminx:
ElectricalMiNx Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yep...I agree~
Reply
:iconpoisonazalea:
PoisonAzalea Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2015  Student Writer
I actually know enough to write a lemon fanfic.
Reply
:iconelectricalminx:
ElectricalMiNx Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
*Shakes you* Make one, NAW!!!!
Reply
:iconpoisonazalea:
PoisonAzalea Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2015  Student Writer
But my brother knows about my DA account. So if he sees it, well.........
:BombingEscape: 
Reply
:iconelectricalminx:
ElectricalMiNx Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Welp...That's craptastic...
Reply
:iconpoisonazalea:
PoisonAzalea Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2015  Student Writer
Indeed it is.

I so wanted to write a Switzerland x reader lemon....
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconagenuslewolfus:
AgenusLeWolfus Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Right!
Reply
:iconkitsunefireball:
Kitsunefireball Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2014  Student General Artist
PETER XD YOUR MIND IS CORRUPTED BY THE INTERNET. JUST LIKE MINE
Reply
:iconhetaliafangirl01:
hetaliafangirl01 Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
ok I laughed when I saw Peter was Swedens and Finlands son and thought tht ment they were "together"
and the thought of y Peter knew wht sex was
Reply
:iconvenblack1398:
venblack1398 Featured By Owner Dec 18, 2014  Hobbyist
www.hapakenya.com/sextalk/

It just reminded of this.
Reply
:iconelyanaxlevilove:
elyanaxlevilove Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2014  Student Digital Artist
wait y r nor and den together i hate and i mean HATE THAT SHIP!
Reply
:iconorchidblossom10:
OrchidBlossom10 Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2015  Student General Artist
I hate it too, YOU ARE NOT ALONE
Reply
:iconartist-cupid:
Artist-Cupid Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Dude, it's NorwayXREADER. Basically, Norge just hit Den with a nail-covered baseball bat. 
Reply
:icontechnozoid:
Technozoid Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Norway : it's raping time
me:nooooooo *gets dragged away by a horny Norwegian 
Reply
:iconagenuslewolfus:
AgenusLeWolfus Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I would be like *wtf how am I gonna enjoy being raped?*
Reply
:icontechnozoid:
Technozoid Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
XD 
Reply
:iconbeandlive:
beandlive Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2014
XD
Reply
:icontechnozoid:
Technozoid Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
XD
Reply
:iconandromecorn10101:
Andromecorn10101 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
For a second me and my perverted mind thought that by 'pumping' England and France were doing something...
...But then I realized that perverted minds never come true.
Reply
:iconelyanaxlevilove:
elyanaxlevilove Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2014  Student Digital Artist
i know right
Pervy Sweatshirt Pervy Bubbles Pervy Blossom PervyMik PervyMoni Re uploading 2 Re uploading 5 pervydcflashplz Re uploading 4 Re uploading 6 Re uploading 3 :PervyYuki: :PervyBlue: Pervy Y!Dumuzi Re uploading 7 PervyDarkyPLZ 
Reply
:iconwolfy7980:
Wolfy7980 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2014
Me 2
Reply
:icons1lvermoon:
S1lvermoon Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Me and France taught him about the 'birds and the bees'
Reply
:icongamergirl0002:
GamerGirl0002 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Can you send me that video
Reply
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Submitted on
September 9, 2012
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